


Redemption

by FancyFree2813



Series: Layers (originally named The Goofy Mountie Series [24]
Category: due South
Genre: F/M, M/M, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:53:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27334483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FancyFree2813/pseuds/FancyFree2813
Summary: Kerri runs away from the Author and right in to an Alternate Universe, where things are exactly the same yet very different.
Relationships: Ray Kowalski/Other(s)
Series: Layers (originally named The Goofy Mountie Series [24]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1954873





	Redemption

**Author's Note:**

> This is absolutely a sequel to The End. In fact it might even be called The End Part II. If you don’t read that one first you will have absolutely no idea what the heck this is all about. Since posting this I have thought of a new name for this story - if The End and Redemption had been posted as one story, which several people suggested, I would have called it "In the End - Redemption".

Prologue  
Once upon a time, in a land far, far away there lived a scribe known as Lady Author. Over the passage of time she was entrusted with committing to parchment the life and loves of the citizens of the Kingdom of Layers, and of the gallant knight Renfield and his stalwart fellows, Ray and Benton. And of Renfield’s lady, Kerri, who was known throughout the land as the fairest of maidens. 

Fair Maid Kerri had garnered the attention of many of the Kingdom’s most powerful noblemen. But Maid Kerri’s heart belonged to Sir Renfield, and to their castle Great Expectations. Sir Renfield was renowned far and wide in legend and fable as a fierce warrior who had slain countless foes who sought to steal Maid Kerri away from Castle Great Expectations. 

Time passed. Sir Renfield wed the fair Maid Kerri and they became Lord and Lady of Castle Great Expectations, where they lived happily. Sir Stanley, who preferred the title of Sir Ray, and Sir Benton embarked on many great adventures, at times accompanied by Sir Renfield. Eventually Sir Benton even sought the hand of the lovely Lady Margaret.

But over the passage of time Lady Author came to understand that, as with all great stories, the tales of Sir Renfield must finally come to an end. And so Lady Kerri, Castle Great Expectations, and indeed the entire Kingdom of Layers, were committed to the pages of history. 

But an outcry was heard across the world of Due South. Fie, fie! A pox upon Lady Author for laying siege to Castle Great Expectations and Kingdom Layers. They must rise up against the injustice! Storm the gates of Lady Author’s Domain! Demand that she release her hostage Lady Kerri, reunite her with Lord Renfield, rebuild the Castle and restore their beloved Layers to its rightful place in the world with all other Due South Kingdoms.

Lady Author paid heed to their outcry, and though she had been content to allow Kingdom Layers to suffer the same fate as many other fables, she feared the worst. And so, yielding to the will of the citizens of the world of Due South, she embarked upon a journey to rebuild Castle Great Expectations. The journey was long, fraught with danger, detours and delays. But finally she persevered and the Kingdom of Layers was restored at last.

And so a proclamation went forth across the land. Lady Kerri had been released from her imprisonment in the Dungeon called Oblivion! Castle Great Expectations would be rebuilt and the Kingdom of Layers would regain its rightful place on the map of the world Due South.

She titled her fable of the restoration of Kingdom Layers:

Redemption  
by Shirley Russell

As Kerri ran away from The Author it started to rain. As she rounded the corner and turned off the block that was the former home of the Great Expectations Bookshop it rained harder. And as she ran along the deserted streets that led to the Canadian Consulate the rain came down in torrents.

She was completely oblivious to anything going on around her, however. So intent on her destination, she barely realized as she bounded up the steps that she was soaking wet. She burst through the front door, drenched, dripping and breathless. 

Once inside the door the first person she saw was the very person she sought – Constable Turnbull. “Renny!” she gasped. “I’m so glad you’re here! I was afraid maybe she might have deleted or, or erased or that you might not even be a Mountie or wouldn’t be here! I wouldn’t let her separate us! She tried, oh, she tried, said you wouldn’t be yourself, said you wouldn’t remember, you wouldn’t be my husband anymore. But I didn’t believe her! Our love is stronger than that. I knew it would be okay. Oh, Renny, I’m so glad…” Her final rush of words were mumbled unintelligibly into the Constable’s chest, as she had thrown herself against him, assuming he would be as glad to see her as she was to see him.

Nothing could have been farther from the truth. Turnbull’s initial shock quite rapidly turned to mortification as this unknown woman pressed herself violently against him, getting him wet and upsetting the decorum of the Consulate. Not only that, but she had called him RENNY!

“My good woman, please take your hands off me!” he demanded as he unsuccessfully tried to push her away. “Please,” he muttered, trying to keep his voice and composure at an acceptable level as he continued to struggle with her, “you are getting my uniform all wet! And, and dripping all over the lovely parquet floor!” He knew that it was only a matter of a few seconds before several other occupants of the Consulate came out of their offices to see about the commotion. And one of those people would be the Inspector. And no matter what the reason for the disturbance, he would be blamed for it. 

He was finally successful in getting her off of him, but that did not stop her flow of words.

“Renny! It’s me, Kerri! Your wife! You remember! Of course you remember! Please tell me you remember me! You have to remember-”

Add horrified and even terrified to mortified, Turnbull was all three. “I beg your pardon!” As he had anticipated, at that moment Inspector Thatcher appeared.

“Constable!” she snapped. “What’s the meaning…” she hesitated just momentarily. “Did I understand this woman to say that she is your wife? Why was I not made aware that you are-”

“Meg! Please, you know me! We’re friends…uh,” Kerri racked her brain trying to think of something to jog Meg’s memory, “you stood up with me at our wedding? Please, you have to remember! Remember how we laughed at the powder blue tuxedos? And the ridiculous limousine that was at least as long as a football field? And the times we drank tea on rainy Saturdays in the tearoom at the Bookshop? And you told me how badly you want to return to Canada. And, and…” Kerri was verging on hysteria, and Meg could see it.

“I think first of all you need to calm down,” Meg said, in her most solicitous voice. “I’m sure you believe all you are saying. Why don’t we just sit down and-"

At that instant Kerri spotted Fraser and Kowalski hurrying toward the sound of the commotion. “Oh, thank God, Benton,” she whispered. Just the sight of him eased her mind. He was the most level headed man she knew, of course he would know her. “Please remind Renny and Meg who I am?” she pleaded. “They don’t seem to remember.”

Fear began to rise in her throat as she watched him frown and run the telltale fingernail across his eyebrow. 

“I’d be happy to tell them,” he said as he scowled, “if I knew myself.” Concern settled in his eyes, and a fair amount of worry. The unknown woman before him looked terribly upset. “I’m sorry,” he said softly, “but I’m sure if we had met I would remember. Perhaps, uh,” it was very much unlike him to be evasive, but he was at a complete loss as to what to say. “Perhaps you have us confused with someone else.”

Even Ray looked at him askance at that remark.

Kerri felt the room begin to spin. This couldn’t be happening! She was so sure that as soon as Renny saw her he would remember. The love they felt for each other couldn’t possibly die with just the press of the ‘delete’ key on a computer. It just wasn’t possible.

“Please, Ray?” she whispered, turning to her last hope . “You’re our friend, Renny’s and mine. Don’t you remember?” Tears were beginning to stream down her cheeks. “You’re Benton’s partner, although he didn’t believe you were Ray Vecchio at first. He even set about proving you weren’t Vecchio. You wanted a new life, that’s why you took Ray Vecchio’s place. But you’ve learned to be happy as plain old Ray Kowalski, our friend…and our daughter’s godfather. You must remember, you just have to. Someone has to believe me!”

Ray just looked confused. “I’m with Frase. I’m good with faces, ‘n yours I think I’d remember. ‘N, sorry buddy,” he said, pointing at Turnbull, “but as for bein’ friends, I don’t even know this guy’s first name. And I know I’d remember bein’ anybody’s godfather.”

Fraser frowned at his far too brutally honest partner. “Maybe Inspector Thatcher is correct,” he said, in his most reassuring voice, which sounded more than a little patronizing. “Maybe we should sit down and try to figure this out.” He looked to Turnbull for a little assistance, but it seemed the other Constable had taken to cowering against the wall, obviously terrified of the woman and her claim of being his wife.

“NO!” Kerri shouted and stomped her foot. Everyone else in the foyer recoiled a few inches at the vehemence in her voice, with the possible exception of Turnbull, who, if he recoiled any further, would have actually been standing inside the foyer wall. “Someone needs to listen to me!” She grabbed her head, which was pounding so violently she could hardly speak. “I must be in the wrong place. I’m in an alternate universe, or a parallel universe, another reality, or some kind of time warp.” She had begun to babble and wasn’t making sense, even to herself. “I’ve been watching too much TV,” she muttered. “There’s got to be some explanation. The Author said I’d be on my own, but I was so sure someone would know me. Everything’s the same but no one remembers. How’s that possible, have the last few years just ceased to exist? Who am I? Why…”

She paced and babbled, babbled and paced. Fraser and the rest, with the possible exception of Turnbull, were rapidly becoming alarmed for the woman. Turnbull was just terrified for himself, he didn’t have the emotional resources to feel much of anything for anyone else at the moment.

“Please, Miss, er, Mrs. Turnbull,” Meg corrected herself, “you need to sit down and calm down.” 

Meg tried to take Kerri’s arm, but Kerri jerked away. As she did she slipped in a pool of water and fell backward into Renfield, who had the unfortunate poor taste to scream. Kerri turned and looked into his terror stricken eyes, then fell to the floor in a dead faint.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

The sound of hushed voices roused Kerri. Someone had moved her to the loveseat in Meg’s office, where she lay, somewhat uncomfortably with her legs hanging over the edge. She was about to speak when something in the tone of the voices she heard alarmed her. She stayed still where she lay and kept her eyes closed – and listened.

“…I’m at a loss. She didn’t have a purse, wallet, or anything in her pockets that could even begin to identify her. She’s not even wearing a coat. The only thing that I could find was a fairly new Aldo Shoes impression on the insole of her left shoe.” Fraser reported. 

“Well, we know that she has at least been shopping in Canada. It would be stretching it a quite a bit to say that makes it our jurisdiction, but we do need to do something for her,” Meg sighed. “She’s obviously emotionally disturbed. Detective Kowalski should take her to St Elisabeth’s Hospital Psychiatric Center.”

“She sure seems loony tunes,” Ray added. “But she knows stuff. How do ya think she knows all that stuff about me ‘n Vecchio ‘n all? It’s kinda spooky.”

“I’m afraid I have to agree with the Inspector. She needs medical attention.” But Fraser also acknowledged Ray’s musing. “It does seem strange that she knows things about us personally. And her claim to be Turnbull’s wife – that does seem a rather odd. Turnbull?”

Turnbull was either unable or unwilling to comment. Rather, he was content to hide just outside Thatcher’s office door.

“Constable! This concerns you most of all. Get in here, that’s an order!” Meg snapped.

When her junior officer failed to move, Meg stormed toward him, with Fraser and Kowalski close behind. “You’re sure you’ve never met this woman?” she demanded as she reached the foyer. Pushing him farther down the hall so that they weren’t standing in the doorway and wouldn’t disturb the woman on her loveseat, she began again. “Why would she claim to be your wife? Are you trying to evade your financial or emotional responsibility for this poor woman? And she said that you have a child! Explain yourself, Constable!”

Turnbull moaned pathetically and looked as if he were about to cry. “I-I-I w-w-would n-never…”

Fraser felt compelled to intercede on his fellow officer’s behalf. “Inspector, I’m sure Constable Turnbull would never shirk his duty. If, of course, there were any duty here for him to do. Which I’m sure there isn’t.”

Turnbull shook his head so violently Kowalski was sure he could hear the marbles rattling. However, if pressed he would have to admit that he actually felt rather sorry for the guy. It was every man’s worst nightmare – to have a woman he couldn’t remember show up claiming he was the father of her child. Well, every man except Fraser. Fraser remembered every person, male or female, he’d ever met. And Ray would bet Fraser could count the women he’d slept with on one finger. Okay, maybe not one finger, but certainly not more than two.

Ray’s reverie came to an abrupt halt when Fraser shouted, “where is she?” The four of them rushed back into Meg’s now empty office.

So engrossed in deciding Kerri’s fate they had all failed to notice her get up, quietly cross Meg’s office and let herself silently out the side door into the alley.

By the time Fraser realized the loveseat was empty Kerri was long gone.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^  
Kerri hadn’t even had the time to dry off properly before she was running in the rain once again. The difference now, however, was that she was running away from and not toward Renfield.

She ran much as a terrified animal would - blinded by fear. Without direction or destination all she knew was she had to get as far away as possible. She was certain that at least Benton would be after her, and she’d heard often enough from Renny that Benton could track anyone, anywhere. So now her only thought was to get as far away from all of them as fast as she could.

Kerri was in fairly good physical condition, but she finally reached the end of her endurance and could go no farther. She found a dilapidated bus stop and collapsed onto the bench. She buried her head in her hands and tried desperately to get air back into her lungs.

As her heart rate stabilized and her breathing slowed she began to look around. Her panic stricken flight from the Consulate had led her to a part of the city she didn’t recognize. She had absolutely no idea where she was.

A city bus pulled up, the driver assuming that she wished to board. But Kerri had no money, exact change or otherwise, so she just shook her head. The driver slammed the doors and the bus sped away, drenching her in a torrent of muddy water.

If she hadn’t already done so far too many times today, she would have cried. As it was she just felt as if she were losing her mind. Maybe Meg had been right, maybe she did need to be hospitalized. Maybe she was, as Ray had said, ‘loony tunes’. 

Only the certainty of the love she felt for Renny kept Kerri from slipping into yet another alternate universe – one occupied by the insane.

She wandered the rain soaked streets for the rest of the day, drawing pointed stares from many passersby, and the occasional rude remark from a few others who glared at her from under their umbrellas. She knew she looked like hell, but even if she cared there was nothing she could do about it. She was cold and wet and her clothes were extremely dirty but without any money or even identification she was out of luck.

SOL Ray used to call it. She chuckled aloud, causing a young mother walking near her to draw her child closer to her under her umbrella and give Kerri a very wide berth. She had actually scared someone, Kerri thought. She wondered, vaguely, what she might have done if their positions were reversed. Would she turn away and try not to look if she saw someone who so obviously needed help…but also seemed to be ‘loony tunes’? Her mind wasn’t working well enough to formulate an answer.

In her wanderings she could not seem to keep her mind off the look in Renny’s eyes. That vacuous look she remembered from their initial meeting, a very long time ago. But there had been more. Terror, perhaps? She couldn’t remember saying anything to him that would frighten him so much. But then again she couldn’t remember most of what she’d said.

If she couldn’t get past his fear and make him love her, then all of this had been for nothing. She would have been better off letting the Author delete her with all the others.

It was dark before she finally admitted that she had to find help. And she could think of only one place to go. To her befuddled mind there was only one person in this version of reality who might believe her and she’d have to find him.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

She stood, thoroughly drenched and shivering, at Ray Kowalski’s apartment door. She had her fist raised to knock, but hesitated. Ever since she had decided to come here she’d anguished over whether or not any of them believed her. In recalling what little she could remember of the conversation in the Consulate foyer, it seemed Ray might be the least likely to immediately have her carted away. But finally she had decided that it really didn’t matter. She was totally alone, with no verifiable identity, no money, no dry clothes, and no place to stay. She had to turn to someone, and Ray was the only one at the Consulate that morning who hadn’t looked at her as if she were a blithering idiot. No, he’d just considered her ‘loony tunes’.

Finally, she screwed up her courage and knocked on his door. She waited. And waited some more. She was sure that he, or more accurately, someone was inside because she could hear them moving hurriedly around. She had her hand raised to knock again when Ray snatched the door open.

“Whaddya-” he abruptly clamped his mouth shut upon seeing her. 

She realized immediately that her arrival was the height of poor timing. His jeans were buttoned only halfway up and she could see just a slight sheen of perspiration on his bare chest. His hair was more a mess than usual and he seemed slightly out of breath. And more than slightly disconcerted by her presence.

“I – I,” she stammered. Finally, unable to think of anything else she said, “I didn’t have anywhere else to go.”

Without a word he grabbed her arm and pulled her into the apartment.

She stood silently dripping as he rummaged through a pile of hopefully clean laundry on the floor in the corner and came up with a large towel. Shoving it at her, he finally spoke.

“You know we’ve been lookin’ everywhere for you? You look like crap.”

Overwhelmingly grateful they hadn’t found her and locked her away she chuckled sardonically. “T-that’s appropriate, since I feel t-that way too. T-thanks for the towel.” She was still shivering as she began drying her hair.

“Hey, babe. I’m gonna cut out now. Same time-” The young man who had just immerged from the bedroom came up short upon seeing Kerri. “Helloooo, and just who might you be, sweetheart?”

Kerri couldn’t speak. She was more shocked than she’d ever been in her life. 

This man was also bare-chested, with jeans pulled up but not buttoned. She could see that he wore no underwear. But he didn’t appear to be the least bit nonplused. He actually seemed pleased that he’d shocked her. 

“Same time next week, Lover?” he asked Ray, all the while ogling Kerri. He made for the door, after picking up a few bills that had been left for him on the table. He grabbed his leather jacket from the back of the couch and brushed by Kerri. “Clean yourself up a little, honey and give me a call,” he whispered to her as he fished a business card out of his pocket. Flicking the card under her chin, she finally grabbed it away from him. “I’m an equal opportunity service.”

He turned to Ray. “No extra charge if you’re up for a threesome. Body like that,” he turned back to Kerri and leered at her body, so well revealed through her wet clothing, “could make for an interesting time.”

He purposely brushed against her as he left.

A heavy silence hung in the room for several moments after the door closed behind ‘Matt’, as it said on his business card.

Finally, Ray spoke. “I take it the Ray in you’re, what’d ya call it, alternated universe, isn’t…”

As he hesitated Kerri hurried to interject, “my Ray was married – to…to Stella.”

“Me too. But was is the important part.” He sighed. 

He watched as she swayed on her feet and hurried to catch her before she fell. “When’s the last time you ate somethin’? You gotta be hungry. I’ve got some Chinese left from Matt ‘n me…” He rushed out of the room to get her some food.

Ray brought the take-out boxes and a fork to his coffee table. “Sorry, no clean plates.”

She smiled weakly. This universe – so different, yet so completely the same.

Amazingly, it only took a few bites and she began to feel much better. She sighed deeply at what must come next. “I know that all of this is a lot to absorb, but I’ve got to know if you believe me, Ray.” She pleaded, “please, you’ve got to believe me! I’ll have to leave here right now if you’re planning on trying to lock me up in some hospital somewhere.”

He guessed it had been foolish to hope anything had changed since the Consulate that morning. “I don’t know,” he shrugged. “Ya gotta admit you sounded pretty nuts. But ya sure know lots a stuff about me ‘n Fraser ‘n all. Alternate/parallel universe is stuff ya see on the Sci-fi Channel. Stargate ‘n stuff. It’s hard ta think it could really happen. But,” he smiled, “unless ya totally flip out or sumpthin’ I think I’m safe.”

“At least you don’t think I’m certifiable. I’m not crazy, even if Renny thinks I am.”

“See, that’s another thing. You ‘n Turnbull? He’s like a few clowns short of a circus! If ya get my drift. I can’t see him with anybody, let alone a woman like, well, like you.”

Kerri chuckled and lost a Chow Mien noodle out the side of her mouth as a result. “You mean with a body like mine I could have anyone I wanted?” referring to that awful Matt’s earlier comment. She smiled as she wiped her chin. “You’d be surprised about Constable Turnbull. I was serious when I said that you and he are best friends. You even planned our wedding – in Las Vegas,” she announced, rather proudly. “And you were front row center helping us get the Bookshop up and running…but it’s not there anymore…it’s just a vacant lot…” Her words drifted off.

“Me?” He pondered that for a moment. “Las Vegas wedding, huh? That kinda sounds like something I’d do. So in your, uh world, Turnbull’s a good guy?”

“Yeah. He’s,” Kerri measured her words carefully. If she painted Renny’s sterling qualities with too broad a brush Ray might just decide she really was nuts. “He had a rough time before he arrived in Chicago. But he really idolizes Benton and tries so hard to be like him. Oh sure, he’s still clumsy and a bit goofy at times,” she watched as Ray nodded his head, “but you and Benton have both come to truly respect him.”

“So, there’s more ta him than what meets the eye?” Although if pressed, Ray would have had to admit that with Turnbull what met the eye was pretty easy to look at.

“I love him very much,” she whispered, sadly. “It’s only been a few hours, but it seems like a lifetime since I’ve seen him.” Her voice rose with emotion, “I have to make this Renfield understand! I have to make him love me! Otherwise I don’t have any reason to go on…” Her voice trailed off as she thought of the Turnbull in this reality. The Turnbull who seemed terrified of her.

“That’s not gonna be easy. I’m sorry, but he ‘n Thatcher think you escaped from some loony bin somewhere. I can just see Turnbull runnin’ around with a butterfly net tryin’ ta catch you.” When he saw the stricken look on her face he immediately regretted his words. “I’m not there yet, but at least I’m leanin’ yer way. So anything’s possible.” He could only hope that his words gave her some comfort.

“Thanks,” she sighed. “But how am I ever going to convince him?”

Ray had no answer for her. He did, however, need to talk to her about something else. “I’m sorry ‘bout before, ya know? I mean if you were offended, or anythin’.”

“Oh Ray, I’m not offended,” she whispered. “It doesn’t matter to me if you’re straight or gay or bi-sexual or no sex at all. You have been our best friend for a very long time. You’ve always been there for me when I needed you…”

Ray was pleased but confused. “But?”

Kerri hesitated just long enough to take a deep breath. “It’s just that…what I don’t understand is…why the HELL do you have to PAY for it? You’re a terrific, good looking guy! You could get anyone, man or woman, you wanted. Why would you take a risk like this?” She leaned closer to him and whispered, “he could have a disease, or something.”

Ray laughed out loud. He could see why the other world Ray liked this woman so much. He grabbed another towel and started drying her back. “One word – no strings.”

“That’s two words,” she giggled.

Ray shrugged. “This way’s just easier, ya know? No bars or pickup lines or going home with a one night stand. No emotional stuff. No strings.”

“And no love. That’s sad, Ray, and lonely.”

It was sad and if he would admit it to himself, lonely. But that’s what he wanted, what he felt he deserved. Someday he would look for love again, but not today. For today he was satisfied with Matt and the ‘no strings’ that he came with.

“Get over there and get those wet clothes off! Don’t look at me like that, we just established I like boys, right?”

“Oh, I think you just might like girls, too,” Kerri whispered.

Ray didn’t even acknowledge her words. “…sides, I’m gonna be in the bedroom lookin’ for somthin’ for you ta wear.” He turned serious for just a second. “Didn’t figure you’d wanna go in there, just now.”

“Yeah, that might be a little too much overload at the moment,” she sighed

When Ray returned Kerri had stripped and wrapped herself in the sopping wet towel. Even though it covered the essentials, Ray could still see what Matt had referred to earlier, the promise of a really nice time – if he had been so inclined.

He tossed a couple of pieces of gray clothing on the couch. “Sweatpants ‘n shirt. Put ‘em on. Oh, gimme a break! I’ll turn around.”

“Thanks,” she sighed after she had herself sufficiently covered. At last she was able to actually relax a little. She collapsed into the closet chair and as she did the weight of the events of the day came rushing back.

“You okay?” Ray asked as he sat across from her. “Yer lookin’ better, but still not too great.” Ray was being kind. She looked awful. Huge dark circles under her eyes, skin frighteningly pale, and even though she didn’t seem to be cold any longer, her hands still trembled.

“I’m feeling much better. The food helped, and not being cold and wet. But what makes me feel even better is just idea that someone might believe me. Thanks.” She smiled at him briefly before the smile faded away. “I just wish I knew what I was going to do next. What am I going to do?” She really wasn’t expecting an answer this time either.

“Why don’t you sleep on it? It’s gettin’ late ‘n it’s been a really long day. Not to mention the evening part,” he muttered.

“A little strenuous? Matt wear you out?” she teased.

Ray actually blushed, something Kerri had only seen one other time in the entire time she’d known him. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to embarrass you. I know that you don’t think you know me, but to me you’re not just Renny’s best friend, you’re mine too.” There were tears in her eyes as she continued, “we’ve been through so much. I wish…I wish you knew just how much I love you.”

Her words melted his heart. He could tell by the look in her eyes and the tone of her voice that she was sincere, and that made all the difference. “I may a just met you, but I do believe you’ve known another guy named Ray Kowalski for a really long time. I think I like that guy, that other Ray. He’s got good taste in friends.”

He brought Kerri a blanket and pillow and stayed to see that she was fairly comfortable on his couch. She fell into an exhausted sleep very quickly, but not before pleading for one last thing. “Please don’t tell anyone I’m here? I don’t want anyone else to…” She was asleep before she could finish the thought.

Ray was awake most of the night. He took her clothes to the basement laundry, and once they were clean and dry he folded them and laid them on the table were she’d be sure to find them in the morning. He sat and watched her sleep, all the while pondering the idea of alternate universes and what it might have been like for him to have had a different life. A life that included friendship with Kerri and Renfield Turnbull.

Before he finally went to bed he left her a note. It said, ‘You’re secret’s safe with me’.”

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^  
When Kerri awoke on Ray’s couch the next morning she knew instantly what she was going to do. All of her heartache and soul searching since running away from the Author and the empty lot where her bookshop had once stood yesterday morning had receded into the back of her mind. They had been replaced with a plan. A risky and dangerous plan, for her at least, but to her mind it was the only thing she could do. 

She had to make Renfield Turnbull love her, her entire existence literally depended on it. And the only way she knew how to make him love her was to simply seduce him.

Simple in theory only, of course. She’d seen the terrified look in his eyes yesterday. Once upon a time, a long, long time ago she’d used sex to prove to him how much she loved him. Now she’d have to figure out how to use her body to prove to him how much he could love her.

At least that was her plan.

She folded her blanket and in doing so spied her clothes on the kitchen table. Ray left for work long before she woke up, so she could only thank him silently for washing them for her and bless him for promising not to tell anyone else where she was. “Your secret’s safe with me to, Ray,” she whispered as she let herself out of the apartment.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^  
It was still raining as Kerri walked to where she hoped Renfield lived. Ray lived in the same place in both universes, so it followed that Renfield would live in the place where he had when they first met: the tiny apartment that Benton had once described as being no larger than a cardboard box. The apartment where she and Renny had first lived together.

It took her almost two hours of walking in the rain to make it to the building that, hopefully, housed the apartment of Constable Renfield Turnbull.

A quick check of the names on the mailboxes was both a relief and a little disconcerting. He lived there alright, but the apartment number was different. She found that rather unsettling. She wasn’t quite sure why, so she pushed the thought to the back of her mind and climbed the four flights of stairs.

She was sure that his door would be unlocked, so once again she was surprised that there was another instance of discrepancies between this universe and hers. Again, she pushed the troubling thought to the back of her mind and found the key under the doormat. She let herself in and immediately smiled. The apartment number might have been different and the door might have been uncharacteristically locked, but the interior was just the same – small, sparsely furnished, but comfortable. She hoped the contents of his refrigerator compared favorably to her Renfield’s.

While she was walking she tried to keep her mind off how cold and wet she was by working out the minutest details of her plan to win over Renny. The first part of her Campaign to Win Renfield was to feed him. Her Renfield loved to cook but he also loved to eat, especially complicated gourmet fair. Fortunately, he had spent quite some time trying, with a fair amount of success, to teach Kerri his special little touches in the preparation of many of his favorite dishes.

First, even before she dried off, she rushed to the tiny, postage stamp sized kitchen. She snatched open the refrigerator and almost jumped for joy. She immediately saw all of the other ingredients, so if the package wrapped in white butcher paper contained what she hoped it did she was in incredible luck. She tore open the package and silently looked toward heaven and thanked God.

The meal would be fairly simple to prepare, at least by Renny’s standards. That would give her time to get herself cleaned up. She decided to first take a shower and possibly a little cat nap. She wanted to look the best she possibly could later in the evening. Knowing that this building did not have laundry facilities, she took her wet clothes and hung them over the radiator, noticing that it was not working. THAT had been the same in her world too, she sighed. She purposely left her wet bra hanging on the outside, hoping that Renfield would notice and realize she wasn’t wearing one.

She smiled at the thought. Some men where ‘leg men’, some were ‘butt men’, Renny was definitely a ‘breast man’. She giggled to herself. She’d pointed it out to him once and he’d blushed for the better part of a day. But it was very true, Kerri was well endowed and there were times that he just couldn’t keep his hands off…Well, she just hoped that her newly found luck would hold and this Renfield would have the same predilection as her Renfield. She giggled again.

Since she was now prancing around his apartment buck naked she went to his closet. She found a white oxford cloth shirt that needed mending and a pair of navy blue RCMP workout shorts. After her shower she’d figure out a way to wear them that accentuated her assets.

Once she had showered she felt more hopeful than she had since before the Author had announced they were all being killed off. Oh, she hadn’t said ‘killed off’, she had said ‘deleted’. But it amounted to the same thing in Kerri’s mind. 

Before she took her nap she cleaned the mushrooms, chopped the stems and prepared the stuffing mixture. She cut the veal into two pieces, cut the bacon into small chunks, chopped the parsley and juiced the lemon. She then staged the other vegetables and ingredients so that it would be a simple matter of putting everything together just prior to popping the mushrooms in the oven. She hoped that Renfield returned home at approximately the same time as her Renfield had, that way the meal would be ready just about ten minutes after he walked in the door. She washed all of the things she had used in the prep work and put away everything she could.

She then paid attention to her clothes. His shirt was about five sizes too big and hung to her knees, but she tied the tails tightly at her waist, rolled up the sleeves and left it unbuttoned down quite a ways. She rolled up the shorts at the waist and cuffs and went to look at her reflection in the mirror. She almost laughed out loud. There was just no getting around it – Renfield’s clothes were far too big for her. Well, maybe if this mini stretch of luck held just a little longer she wouldn’t be wearing this outrageous outfit much after dinner.

Then she laid down on the sofa for a short nap.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^  


He could smell a lovely aroma wafting around the corridor when he reached the top of the stairs. It smelled remarkably like the alliatelli acatuchio companudorie evisilico dafiena mosca that he had intended to prepare last evening. That was until that wretched woman had invaded his sanctuary at the Consulate, of course.

He had spent a lovely Saturday morning strolling through the neighborhood farmer’s market selecting the vegetables and special mushrooms for his funghi cappelle infarcite. He’d even treated himself to a small bouquet of hot house flowers to brighten up his apartment. Then he’d taken the ‘L’ all the way to the other side of town just to purchase the best veal in all of Chicago. 

The anticipation of a wonderful meal had filled his thoughts as he walked to work Monday morning, but after that person had accused him of being her husband and the father of her child, he was so upset he couldn’t eat, much less even think about preparing his favorite meal. Even the weather had turned against him. After such a lovely, warm weekend, it starting raining shortly after he arrived at the Consulate Monday morning and it hadn’t stopped since.

He sincerely hoped that she had been committed to some hospital somewhere by now. He didn’t care to know, but he’d overheard the Inspector tell someone on the phone that Constable Fraser was actively searching for her. Just as long as she didn’t bother him again!

By the time he reached his door, he was concerned that the wonderful aroma was indeed coming from his apartment, and when he opened the door he was sure. And then he saw her.

“What are you doing here?” he demanded, barely inside the door.

“I thought I’d make your dinner and maybe we could talk,” she smiled.

“What makes you think I want you in my home!” he shouted.

She had anticipated his reluctance, so she wasn’t too surprised by his tone. “I know that I didn’t make a very good impression yesterday, and I’m truly sorry for that,” she apologized. “So I thought you might give me the opportunity to make amends.” She smiled hopefully.

This woman truly scared him. “I don’t want you here!”

“Couldn’t we just talk?” Kerri was beginning to feel her plan disintegrating, but she wasn’t going to give up. Her future depended on him listening to her…and of course the sex part. “Dinner is almost ready, and I know it’s your favorite. I stuffed the mushrooms just like you taught me – using the chopped stems. And-”

“If you don’t leave my home in the next five seconds, I am going to call the police and have them haul you out!”

“Renny, please, don’t-”

“PLEASE, do NOT call me that!” he shouted.

Kerri had never seen such vehemence from Renfield. Oh, sure, he’d yelled at her once or twice (and one of those times was when she came perilously close to tripping over the dog and falling down the stairs). But this Renfield was really angry.

“I –I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I – I didn’t mean to offend you. It’s j-just so important that I speak with you. I need you to understand why-”

“That’s 5.” 

He took a couple of steps toward the phone before Kerri yelled. “Please don’t! I just want you to understand…” The look on his face told her this wasn’t going to happen, he wasn’t going to listen, much less believe her. “I’ll go…” 

She walked slowly to the radiator, gathered her still sopping wet clothes and took them to his bedroom to change. She barely made it through the door before she succumbed to waves of despair. She had to support herself against the wall to keep from falling to the floor as uncontrollable sobs began to wrack her body. She was terrified that Renfield would call someone to come and take her away before she could get out of there, but she just simply could not move.

Renfield heard her begin to cry, and then only a couple of seconds later the timer on the oven buzzed. As it did he was reminded of something she said. He took the stuffed mushrooms out of the oven and sat them on the stove next to the sauté pan of gently simmering sauce for the veal. He stared at them for just a moment. Then he went into his bedroom.

Her sobbing really upset him – mostly because he knew he was the cause. He’d taken an immediate dislike to her. No, not dislike, more like a strong aversion though he really didn’t understand why. He had been downright mean to her and that was not like him. And he just couldn’t stand to hear a woman cry.

He stood behind her, wanting to put a reassuring hand on her shoulder, but also still being more than a little afraid of her.

Finally he decided that not touching was best. Instead, he asked, “how did you know that sautéed veal and stuffed mushrooms is my favorite meal?”

She stood with her back to him, still crying, but at least the uncontrollable sobbing had ended. She was cleared headed enough to know to not even mention alternate realities or universes or anything else that might have him running to the phone to call the authorities.

“I j-just knew,” she lied.

“You said I taught you how to make the stuffing?”

She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and turned to face him. She studied his eyes for a long while but did not answer him.

“I can understand why you wouldn’t want to tell me, I’ve been very rude to you. But you have to understand – you frightened me yesterday, and then you show up in my home. You told everyone I was your husband and the father of your child, but I’ve never even been with… And, and you called me Renny,” he admitted, assuming that would explain everything. “I’d like to know about the meal, and you don’t have to worry about my thinking you’re, uh…”

“Loony tunes?” she asked, still very unsure he didn’t think exactly that.

“Detective Kowalski does have an unfortunate way with words at times, doesn’t he?”

Kerri slowly realized that this was the first time this Renfield had come anywhere close to acknowledging that she might be telling the truth. But she wasn’t about to push it, only a few minutes ago he’d threatened to call the police if she didn’t leave.

He took the wet clothes from her and put them back over the radiator. “It works, occasionally. If we’re lucky it will fire up in time to dry your clothes. I’d like to have a little more reliable heat source, but one does what one has to. The apartment is so small that when the oven’s on that keeps me warm. And since it’s only me, I don’t need a lot of heat. Hudson Bay blankets really keep you warm, don’t you think? And heavy clothes help, and…”

Renfield was doing something that Kerri recognized immediately. He was babbling, of course, but his babbling almost always covered his inability to cope with a situation. She was certain that was happening now. He didn’t know what to say, so he said whatever came to mind. Rather than listen to any more, she decided to speak up.

“Maybe we could eat something? If you’d prefer something different than what I fixed I’ll certainly understand-” she said meekly, still afraid the wrong word or movement might frighten him into doing something she would regret.

“Oh, no! I love alliatelli acatuchio companudorie evisilico dafiena mosca con funghi cappelle infarcite,” he smiled. “And if I hadn’t been so rude I would have told you so immediately.”

This version of Renfield had her completely befuddled. One minute he was shouting at her, the next he acted like he wanted to be friends. She was afraid of what might be coming next.

Renfield insisted that, since she had prepared the meal, that he should serve it. So he prepared their plates and took the food to the table. They ate in uncomfortable silence for the next few minutes.

Finally, “this is perfect! It’s prepared exactly as I would have…” He hesitated while he pondered what he had just said. “But you knew that didn’t you? You knew exactly how I like this prepared. How do you know that?” Earlier in the day his question would have been an accusation, but now he was genuinely curious.

“I don’t think you really want to know,” she whispered, afraid to look at him.

“You said I taught you to make the stuffing-”

She finally looked him in the eye. “Ren…field, yesterday I terrified you. What’s changed?”

“The food,” he said, pointing at his plate.

“What?”

“You knew things about Detective Kowalski, Constable Fraser and Detective Vecchio, things it’s possible you might have learned elsewhere. But now you know about my favorite food and exactly how I prepare it. I made it for Ms. Vecchio once, but even she doesn’t know my little secret touches.” His brows knitted together in concentration so deep it looked painful. “Please tell me how you know about the food.”

It was Kerri’s turn to be terrified. If he didn’t believe her then all of this, the running away from the vacant lot and the Author, the commotion at the Consulate yesterday morning, the wandering around lost, cold, soaking wet and dirty, the afternoon spent planning and preparing this meal, all of it had been for nothing. If he didn’t believe that she was his wife in an alternate universe and that she’d come here to make him love her – well, for the first time she came face to face with what failure would truly mean.

It had all come down to this. She weighed her words very carefully. “Yesterday I told you I was your wife. Where I’ve come from that’s true…” she watched him closely. “I don’t know exactly how to explain it, I’m not really sure myself. I think I’m from what might be called an…an alternate universe or alternate reality. Where things are exactly the same, but yet completely different.” 

She watched as he got up from the table and walked the few steps it took to get to the far side of the room. He stopped within inches of the phone, standing with his back to her. She remained silent, all of her energy directed to watching his movements, and planning her escape if he moved in the wrong direction.

“Tell me about him, your Renfield?” he asked.

She was so relieved she almost fell out of her chair. “Are you sure you want to know all of this? I mean, I don’t want to upset you.” That was truly an understatement.

She watched his back and heard him sigh. “There’s only one thing that really upsets me…that…that’s when you call me…”

“By that nickname? The one you told me not to call you?” she asked gently.

“Yes.”

She hesitated to ask, assuming that he would prefer not to talk about it. “My Ren…Renfield and I have been together almost four years,” Kerri said, changing what was obviously an uncomfortable subject. “Several months ago we adopted Bethy. Mary Elizabeth.”

“She’s not your biological child?”

“No,” she said, unsure why it would matter. “But she’s adored as much, maybe more than any child anywhere. Renfield loves children, in fact he was a school teacher at one time.”

Renfield spun around. “He’s not a Mountie?”

“Oh, yes! Sometimes I think he loves the force more than us,” she giggled. “He taught school prior to joining the force. But he had a tragedy in his life and left teaching. He’s always wanted to be surrounded by kids, and they just love him! He has so much fun. He even reads to the children every Saturday.”

Renfield watched her carefully. Since first seeing her yesterday, he had thought she was a rather scary looking woman, but as she began to speak of her husband her appearance changed. The more she talked about him the more beautiful she became, as if their love transformed her. But Renfield didn’t really understand why, having never experienced that kind of power himself.

“Why do you love him?”

Oh my, she thought “I don’t know if I can put that into words. I love the way he looks, of course,” she cast him a sideway glance, hoping he caught the inference. “But he’s kind and sensitive, he’s fiercely loyal but open minded. And he can be goofy and clumsy…he trips over his own feet quite a lot! But most of all I know that on all the earth God created Renfield Turnbull just for me.”

“In your world.”

“In any world!” She hadn’t meant to be quite so emphatic but couldn’t help herself.

Renfield was obviously trying hard to understand. “But…how do you know?”

“Know?”

“Know that you’re in love.”

Now it was beginning to make sense, but Kerri didn’t much like where she was afraid this was heading. “Renfield, do you have a girlfriend?”

“I hardly see how that’s…no,” he seemed sad to admit it. He sat in an armchair with a thud.

She was thrilled and saddened at the same time. Her plan would have been much harder to implement if there had been another woman, and yet she felt he must be very lonely. Kerri moved to sit on the table directly across from him. “Have you ever been in love?” she whispered.

He shook his head dejectedly.

“Is that why you were so upset with me yesterday? Because I claimed to be your wife when you don’t even know what it’s like to be in love?”

“I hadn’t realized it until now, but I guess it is,” he admitted, sadly.

“May I ask you a very personal question?” she asked softly.

He looked wary but nodded.

“Are you a virgin?”

“NO!” he exclaimed, far too forcefully. After a moment he signed. “Yes…well, sort of, I guess,” he admitted sadly.

She put her hand gently on his knee. “I’m not an expert, but I’m pretty sure it’s not physically possible to be sort of a virgin.” She smiled reassuringly. “Do you feel like telling me why you’re confused about it?” she asked. “I’m here to listen, if you’d like.”

Renfield shook his head.

Neither of them said anything else for several long moments. Finally Renfield pursed his lips in thought. “I guess it might explain why I’ve treated you so badly.” He looked into her eyes briefly, and then his gaze settled somewhere in the vicinity of his front door knob. “And maybe I’d feel better about it if I finally told someone.”

Kerri couldn’t imagine what terrible secret he might be about to reveal. But he didn’t look like it was going to be easy for him, so she waited without pushing. 

After several long moments he just spit it out. “We, that is I have four older brothers, much older.”

“We?” Kerri asked with more than a little trepidation.

“Yes,” Renfield said sadly. “I had a twin-”

Oh, lord, Kerri thought. “Had?” she asked and was immediately sorry that she kept interrupting.

“Yes. He died when we were six, in a car wreck with our mother. His name was René…”

Yeah, I know, she thought. She almost said something but thought better of it. There was absolutely no reason for him to know about the René of her universe. He was dead too, thank God.

“Anyway, we were kind of afterthought babies, I think, kind of an accident. Then my dad died when I was ten and my stepmother was just too sad to pay much attention to her stepson, so my brothers sort of took over trying to teach me things my dad would have. Fishing, and a lot of other things.” He winced before he continued, “sometimes I think I was their guinea pig. Anyway, I never had a girlfriend, so when I was sixteen my brothers decided I needed to learn about ‘love’ so they took me to the city to…to a uh…a…”

“A prostitute?”

“Yes,” he said, matter-of-factly. “Marmaduke said that I needed to learn to be a man. And since he was the oldest he picked the uh…uh…lady. Apparently he had visited her himself. All four of them waited outside while I went it. It was…wasn’t a very nice place.” He looked stricken, as if it had been the most horrific experience of his young life. “But, I learned something. Not exactly what my brothers were expecting though. I learned that night that I don’t measure up as a man. I couldn’t…I mean I didn’t…I wasn’t able…”

He was so humiliated it just broke Kerri’s heart. “You couldn’t perform,” she said matter-of-factly.

“She laughed at me! She said maybe I should go down the block to a…a man, since if she couldn’t…well then no woman would be able to light my fire. Finally she used…um, oral…,just so she could get paid.”

Kerri knelt on the floor next to his chair. “Were your brothers waiting outside to hear about your experience?” she asked softly, trying to be as gentle as she could, all the while cursing Marmaduke and the three other unnamed brothers who could have done this to a shy young boy.

“I lied to them, of course. To this day my brothers brag about the night I became a man and the part they played. Renny became my special code name if they wanted to joke about it when our stepmother was around.”

He looked so forlorn she just laid her cheek on his knee. “I’m so sorry. No wonder you hate the name so much.” But then her head snapped up to look into his stricken eyes. “But don’t you see? You were a shy, sensitive boy, with four brothers right outside just waiting to kid you about it. No wonder you couldn’t perform! And shame on them for putting you in that situation!”

Renfield smiled weakly, but she could tell that he was still miserable.

“And you never tried to be with a woman again?”

“No,” he admitted. “When I was old enough to join the force I left for depot and there was just no time for ‘dating’. And then I came to Chicago and I might as well have been invisible to women, with Constable Fraser around. Which is probably just as well…” his thoughts drifted off.

Here was the opening for which Kerri had been planning since waking up this morning. It was just that now she wasn’t sure that seducing Renfield was the right thing to do.

She stared at him and continued to kneel next to the chair. He was Renfield, she convinced herself. The only major difference between this man and the one she had married was possibly one humiliating experience of a sixteen year old boy. He was sensitive, shy, awkward, and endearing. Maybe this is exactly what he needs, she thought. She could prove to him that he was a warm blooded, virile man with so much to offer a woman. So much to offer her.

“What are you smiling at?” he asked.

“You,” she admitted.

“May I ask you a personal question?”

“Of course. I’ve certainly asked you enough in the last few minutes. Ask away.”

“Is he, uh, um…good? In…uh, in the…uh bedroom, I mean?” Renfield blushed deeply.

Kerri grinned and didn’t miss a beat. She couldn’t answer him quickly enough. “Absolutely!” Then she saw the stricken look return to this Renfield’s face. “Oh, please, Renfield! You cannot compare yourself to him!” Although that was exactly what she had been doing, she realized. “You are NOT less of a man because of one regrettable incident! When you were sixteen!” She was so emphatic she even surprised herself. “My Renfield is a wonderful lover, yes, but you could be too – if you would just give yourself another chance.”

“Oh, no,” he moaned. “I can’t.”

“Renfield,” she whispered, tenderly, “I’m here, right now and I know if we were to try that I could prove to you how virile-”

“I can’t,” he whispered again. “Please understand? I just can’t.”

And she knew he couldn’t. Kerri’s plan fell apart, but right now that didn’t matter. She rose up on her knees and put her hand gently on his cheek. “It’s okay,” she whispered tenderly. “Maybe someday you’ll be ready, maybe not,” she kissed him on the cheek. “But you have to believe that if you are never with another woman it doesn’t make you less of a man. You are a wonderful person, a wonderful man just the way you are. But hiding in Benton’s shadow is just not good for you!”

Kerri smiled resolutely. So this was it. “Is it okay if I sleep here tonight? Apparently I don’t have anywhere else to go,” She tried to put on a brave face, but she wasn’t at all sure what she was going to do next.

Renfield came alive at being given another subject to dwell upon. “Of course! You can stay here just as long as you need to. There’s really not much of a selection for sleeping arrangements,” he muttered. “You could use my bed and I would sleep on the floor in my sleeping bag, the sofa’s not long enough for me. Or you could sleep on the sofa, I wouldn’t think of having you sleep on the floor, or-”

“Renfield? You’re babbling,” she smiled. “Give me a blanket and a pillow and I will be fine on the sofa.” Her words belied her true thoughts. She would not upset this wonderful man any more than she already had.

He trotted off to find appropriate bedding just as the radiator began to whistle. “Ah, heat. Let’s hang your things over the register and they should be nice and dry by the morning. Now forging ahead to find that blanket!” he stated as he left the room.

Kerri was only alone for a couple of minutes, but in that time her predicament became glaringly obvious. Since this universe would probably never include a Mrs. Renfield Turnbull, she would never have a place here.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^  
Even though admitting his shameful secret to another human being was the hardest thing Renfield had ever done, by the time he climbed into bed he realized he felt better than he had in a very long time. Telling another person had been cathartic, in more ways than he could count.

In fact, he now believed he was probably closer to Kerri than he had ever been to any woman, or probably ever would be. He fell asleep wishing that he could be the Renfield she was married to – that she loved.

A strange noise awakened him only a couple of hours later. What he heard caused him to sit bolt upright and make a mad dash for Kerri.

He had never heard anything like it. It could only be described as an unearthly keening that revealed a depth of despair he couldn’t begin to imagine. She sat with her arms wrapped around her drawn up knees, rocking and moaning. It wasn’t loud, just the most unsettling sound he’d ever heard.

“Oh, my! Oh, my! What is it, what can I do? How can I help?” he asked, rocking from one foot to the other, needing to touch her, but afraid to do so. Finally, when he couldn’t stand it any longer, he sat next to her and gathered her up into his arms. 

He held her tightly as she continued to moan. For once in his life he didn’t babble, he didn’t say a word. He just tried to give her silent comfort in his embrace. After a very long time it seemed to do the trick because she quieted.

But he had gone far too long without speaking and finally he couldn’t stand it anymore. “Can you tell me what it is?”

When she finally pulled away and looked at him he could see her face in the moonlight. Her eyes were dry, but haunted and she was ghostly pale. “I can’t be here,” she said softly, words devoid of emotion. “I don’t exist in this place. I don’t belong here. I am no one, I have nothing. But I don’t know how to get back. I’ve been lying here trying to think of a way. The bookshop’s not there! It’s just a trashy vacant lot! Everyone, everything I know is gone. I miss Renny and Beth.” She began to cry. “I’m sorry,” she sniffed, “I didn’t mean to use that name.”

“Don’t worry about me! You’ve already helped me more than you’ll ever know,” he hurried to say as he grabbed a tissue from a box on the table. He proceeded to wipe her tears. “Let me worry about me and you too. Can you promise to try to get some sleep and we’ll figure this out tomorrow? Things always look better after a good night’s sleep. You came here, there’s got to be a way to get you back. Between them, Detective Kowalski and Constable Fraser can figure out anything!”

“Don’t forget to include yourself. You’ve helped them too!” she sniffed.

Renfield blushed and hung his head in the all too familiar self-deprecating way. “I’m afraid I haven’t been of much use to them, I’m usually more of a hindrance than a help. But I will do everything I can to help them figure out your plight. I will make myself a valuable member of their team!”

Kerri rested her head on his shoulder. “Thank you, Renfield. That means a lot to me.”

“Do you think you will be able to sleep now? I could sit with you if you like, until you doze off.” He sat with her for just a few minutes before she was sound asleep.

Renfield went back to bed terribly concerned but determined to help her find a way home. He began to formulate a plan, one he hoped Constable Fraser would at least consider.

He fell asleep anxious to speak with her in the morning, to begin to help her. But he might never get that chance. When he went to check on her before dawn, Kerri was gone.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

“This bedder be good.” Ray yawned angrily. “It’s the middle a the goddamned night! Who is this and whaddya want!”

“She’s gone,” the caller wailed. “She was asleep but now she’s not there! I got her the Hudson blanket and a pillow. She made me veal! We were going to try to help! I had a plan! It wasn’t much of a plan, but it was as good as I could do. I told her things, and she listened! Her clothes are gone. They were still wet!”

“Turnbull?” Ray demanded. “SHUT UP!”

The caller gulped audibly. “Yes, sir.”

“Now, s-l-o-w and q-u-i-e-t. WHAT the HELL are you blithering about!?”

“She’s gone,” Renfield said, as slowly as he could manage.

“Who’s gone?” Wait a minute! “Kerri? What the hell did you do to her?” he demanded.

“Nothing! We, that is I realized I’d been wrong about her. Not about being a husband, and certainly not about being a father, more about the telling the truth. She just knew too many-”

“Turnbull, SHUT UP! Meet me at the Consulate, right now! And if you’ve done anything to hurt or even scare her, you’ll answer to-” Ray stopped in mind sentence, realizing that Turnbull had taken him literally. As soon as Ray had said ‘right now’ Turnbull had taken off.

Ray called Fraser as he sped through the mostly deserted streets toward the Consulate. “Turnbull found her!”

“That seems highly unlikely Ray. I’ve been searching for over a day and I have found absolutely no information on anyone named Kerri Turnbull, Canadian or otherwise. I can hardly imagine that Turnbull was able to-”

“Fraser! I’m on my way.” With that Ray hung up.

“Understood,” Benton said, to dead air.

Ray had only been at the Consulate for a couple of minutes when Turnbull came running in, breathless.

“What kept ya?” Ray joked.

“I had to dress prior to running here,” he explained.

“You RAN?”

“Well, it’s only 97 blocks.”

“Turnbull, you own a vehicle,” Fraser stated.

“Yes, sir. But, what with the hour being so close to the morning rush I assumed running would be more efficient. And Detective Kowalski did say ‘now’,” he said, still slightly out of breath, “and,” he admitted, “I forgot about the truck.”

“Whatever,” Ray said as he rolled his eyes. “Turnbull, you said you found Kerri?”

“No, Sir…”

Fraser turned to Kowalski, a slightly smug look of self-satisfaction on his face, as if to say ‘see, I knew I was right’.

“…she found me.”

“Whatever. Where is she?”

Renfield had almost forgotten. “Oh dear! I don’t know. We were sleeping-”

“Tagether?” Ray accused.

“Ray, that’s really not any of-” Fraser started to say.

“No! She was on the couch! She’d been really upset, but I thought she’d stay. I told her we would figure what to do in the morning. She prepared alliatelli acatuchio companudorie evisilico dafiena mosca con funghi cappelle infarcite-”

Ray looked sideways at Fraser. “I’m assumin’ that’s a good thing?” he whispered and was shocked to see Fraser shrug in confusion.

“- that’s a wonderful thing,” Turnbull continued. “But she was so troubled. She begged me to believe her. I *told* her we would help her! She was so despondent, but I thought she believed me. I told her that you both would make a plan. She said I could help. Ohhhh, I wanted to help her. She-”

“Turnbull!”

“Ray!” Fraser scowled at him, indicating that Ray needed to ease off Turnbull. Fraser could see that the man was terribly disturbed. “She didn’t give you any indication she would run?”

“No Sir!” When Fraser spoke to him in that way it was so much easier for Turnbull to organize his thoughts. “We spent much of the evening talking. She tried to make me understand her predicament, and I think after a while I did. We went to sleep,” he scowled at Ray, “separately, and I was encouraged by her attitude. But she had a rather rough night. I guess the weight of her situation finally crashed in on her.”

“But she calmed down?” Fraser asked.

“Yes! I sat with her for a while, until she was asleep. But early this morning I checked on her and she was gone.”

“Ya got any idea when she left?” Ray asked.

Renfield pondered for a moment. “I was with her about midnight and it was about 4:30 when I checked on her…so I’d say it must have been somewhere between midnight and 4:30am.”

“Ah, that’d make sense,” Ray said sarcastically.

“Did she give you any indication,” Renfield started to shake his head at Fraser, “any indication at all where she might go or what she might do.”

“No,” Renfield moaned, “nothing we talked about gave me any indication at all. I’m so sorry I didn’t ask more questions about her life…”

“Actually, she might a said something when she was at my place.”

“She was at your apartment, too? Was I the only one who didn’t know where she was? Why on earth did I spend all that time trying to find her, when both of you already knew where she was?” Fraser was angry, but he was also just a little hurt. Hurt that she hadn’t come to him. He was the level headed one, after all.

“Sorry, Frase. She made me promise not ta say anythin’. I think she might have been afraid you might a had her committed,” Ray said.

Fraser had to admit that Ray was probably correct. His plan, once he located her was to have her examined by a doctor. He felt rather badly about that, now.

“…somethin’ about a bookshop that wasn’t there anymore,” Ray was saying. “Although I don’t know if that’ll be any help.”

“Tea on rainy Saturdays at the bookshop.” Kowalski and Fraser looked at Turnbull as if he too were loony tunes. “Tea on rainy Saturdays at the bookshop. That’s what Kerri said to the Inspector. She wanted her to remember…” he said again as he ran for his desk. “I can access city records for buildings that have housed bookshops-”

“That’ve been torn down!” When Turnbull and Fraser both looked confused, Ray explained, “she said it was just a vacant lot! If it was there in her reality, but not in ours, maybe it used ta be a bookshop in our reality.” He grabbed his head. “Does that make any sense? It’s givin’ me a headache.”

“Actually, Ray it makes sense, but your logic is flawed,” Fraser was about to explain when Turnbull giggled.

His head snapped up from his computer screen. “Oh – sorry Sir! It’s just that we’ve been talking about alternate realities, which I used to think existed only in science fiction, and your comment sounded very Vulcan.”

Ray snickered at the reference, but Fraser had no idea what Turnbull was talking about.

Turnbull tapped one last key on the computer and the printer down the hall sprang into action. “Kerri said we, that is she and her Renfield, had been together for four years so I’ve got a list of buildings torn down in the last four years – all of which housed bookstores at one time…”

“So quick?”

Turnbull smiled his self-deprecating smile. “There are a few things I’m good at,” he whispered to himself. Unfortunately, Ray heard him. 

He really didn’t get this guy. He’d have to have something on the ball, he was a Mountie after all. And in that alternate universe thingy he’d made something of himself. Ray promised himself that when this was over and Kerri was safely back in her world he would try to get beyond the goofiness and get to know Turnbull.

Fraser came back from the printer with the list of addresses – two pages long. “This may be a dead end, you know. There’s really no reason to believe she’d go back there, and no way to know,” he held up the very, very long list, “where there is. Or if she’d be there when we came. Or if-”

“We gotta do somethin’ and we gotta have a place to start ‘n we need to get goin’ if we’re gonna get to all these places by dark.” Ray’s head was pounding even harder.

“Understood.” Fraser headed for the door with Ray close at his heel.

But Ray hesitated just as he was almost through the doorway. Turning around he looked at Turnbull, who was still seated at his computer, looking like a lost puppy. “Well?” Ray asked. “You comin’ or not?”

Turnbull jumped up so rapidly he upended his chair. “YES Sir!” he exclaimed, thrilled to be included.  
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

They spent the rest of a very long day looking at parking lots and garages, mini-malls, condominium complexes and high-rise office buildings. All the things that modern civilization puts up when they tear down a bookstore. But they never found any trace of Kerri. 

It was Turnbull who kept the impetus alive. So intent on finding some trace of the woman to whom he had appointed himself protector, he wouldn’t hear of stopping the search. When Ray whined that he was hungry, Turnbull insisted they find a drive-thru so that they could eat while driving. When even Fraser became disheartened, Turnbull reminded him of the search for the killer of his father. “You didn’t give up then, Sir, please don’t give up now.”

And so they kept searching.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^  
It was long past dark when Ray turned off of Canal onto Madison and headed toward Millennium Park. The address they were looking for was up just a couple of blocks on the left.

“…I know we’re not to the bottom of the list yet,” Ray complained. “But it’s raining so hard I can hardly see where I’m goin’!”

“Ray is correct, Constable. Maybe this should be the last address for today. We can redouble our efforts tomorrow, in daylight. And hopefully it won’t be raining. You know it’s possible she’s gone back to your apartment…” Fraser knew that wasn’t likely, since Turnbull had used Ray’s cell phone to call his place every ten minutes for the last eight hours.

“But she doesn’t even have a coat! She’s probably cold and alone and desperate.” As desperate as he was becoming, he thought.

It was the first vacant lot they’d seen today and Turnbull barely let Ray bring the GTO to a stop before he was clambering over Fraser to jump out of the car and run across the street. 

Ray fished a battery operated spotlight out of his trunk to illuminate the lot as Turnbull stumbled and tripped over trash and debris. Fraser scanned the surrounding buildings, looking for any place where a person might seek shelter. The drycleaners across the street was closed for the day, Desome’s, the former Italian Restaurant next door was boarded up, and the meat market down the street looked abandoned as well. It didn’t appear that there was any place a woman could go to get out of the rain in this neighborhood.

Turnbull picked up a dilapidated sign from the dirt that announced ‘Future Home of Border’s Books’. Apparently that hadn’t worked out, he thought. As he continued on, looking for he knew not what, he spied something caught under the edge of a discarded tire. He frowned as he dug out the baseball and studied it.

“Mean anythin’?” Ray asked.

Turnbull continued to frown at the ball. “She said he was always surrounded by children,” he mused. “But no, it doesn’t mean anything. To me, at least,” he said as he dropped baseball to the ground.

“It looks as if this entire block was slated for demolition. The dry cleaner must have been a hold out, so the deal fell through,” Fraser added as he walked up to them.

“That would explain the sign,” Turnbull muttered, nodding toward the ‘Future Home…’ sign.

“She’s not here, can we get outta the rain? Please?” Ray asked Turnbull. 

“Of course, you’re absolutely right.” The disappointment in his voice was so apparent it had Ray and Fraser exchanging worried looks.

“Hey!” he said encouragingly, tossing Turnbull his phone. “Why don’t you try your place again?”

The phone began to play ‘Take Me Out to the Ballgame’ as it was flying through the air. Turnbull caught it and immediately tossed it back to Ray.

“Just what I always wanted ta do, play catch on vacant lot, in the dark, in the pouring rain – with a phone,” he muttered. “Sorry,” he said to no one in particular, “must be tired. Kowalski,” he said as he answered the phone. “Hey, Frannie, what’s up?”

“Where are you guys? I’ve been trying you on the radio! Turnbull there with you?” Frannie demanded.

Her tone was alarming. “Yeah. What’s wrong?” Fraser and Turnbull immediately stopped to listen.

“Ray, the 29th’s gotta jumper on the Outer Drive Bridge,” she said, in a voice filled with urgency. “Sounds like it might be her…”

“Ya sure?”

“Thirty-something, slender, medium height, long blond hair, brown slacks, pink blouse. Yeah, pretty sure.”

“Tell ‘em to stay back, we’re on our way! Five minutes, tops!” Ray shouted. He explained the situation to the others as they ran for the car.

“And Frannie gave you a description?” Fraser asked as they sped toward Lakeshore.

Ray was trying desperately to watch what he could see of the wet road while eyeing the younger Mountie sitting in the seat next to him. “You okay, Buddy?”

Turnbull nodded weakly. “At least we’ve found her,” he muttered

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Once again Turnbull was out and running before Ray brought the car to a sliding stop. The roadbed on the bridge was icy and the cross wind was so strong that the rain fell horizontally. All three men had trouble maintaining their footing, but Turnbull was still able to bulldoze his way through the small police barricade that was meant to keep traffic, both vehicular and pedestrian, away from the scene.

“Hey, you, stop!” a uniformed officer yelled over the howling wind as the streak of red flew through.

“Let him go!” Kowalski yelled as he ran, slipping and sliding, up to the two squad car barricade. He held up his badge and he and Fraser ran on through, several yards behind Turnbull.

Renfield saw her in the beam of the headlights from one of the patrol cars. She was perched on the outside of the railing, facing away from him, looking at the river below. She maintained her footing by holding on to the rail with both hands behind her. She heard the shouting, and someone come to a sliding halt near her, but she did not attempt to look at them.

“I told you to leave me alone!” she screamed. “Back away, or – or I’ll jump!”

“Kerri, it’s me, it’s Renfield!” he yelled, above the howling wind. “Please look at me! Please!”

She spun around, coming perilously close to falling as she did. The wind from behind her caught her hair and blew it wildly, in Medusa-like tendrils, around her head and whipping it at her face. “Renfield, you shouldn’t be here! Please, go away! I don’t want you to be here! Please just let me go…”

Her screams faded away, to the point he could no longer hear her. But he could see her face and watch her wince as her wet hair bit at her skin. Her eyes terrified him – wild and crazed, the look of a cornered animal. Even though her hair was whipping her face she made no attempted to protect herself, as if the physical pain was somehow what she wanted.

“Kerri, PLEASE! You have to come away from there! You’ll fall!” he pleaded, as Fraser and Ray ran up behind him.

“I can’t!” she yelled, almost manically. “I don’t know how else to get back! I’ve searched and searched! I don’t belong here. Don’t you see? This is not my world! My family, my friends, they’re all gone! This is the only way I know to go back where I belong!”

“Kerri, do-” Ray attempted to step forward but Fraser held him back, sensing that their intrusion might literally push her over the edge.

“PLEASE!” Renfield yelled again completely unaware of the presence of the two other men. “Don’t do this! Stay here! Stay with us! With ME! I can be what you need! I can be him! I can be Renny! You thought I WAS him – I can be! Give us, all of us a chance! We can love you, you’re welcome here! We want you to stay! I want-” he cried.

At that instant lightning crashed through the black night sky and struck the bridge with a thunderous crash and a shower of blinding yellow sparks. Kerri screamed and lost her hold. Renfield lunged for her, catching her right hand just as she was starting to fall. But the icy roadway caused him to lose his footing and he almost went over with her. Had it not been for Fraser and Ray, who lunged at him in unison grabbing his legs and belt and pulling him back, Renfield and Kerri would both have plunged into the icy river below.

“Hold on! I’ve got you! Don’t let go! You’ve got to hold on! I can’t let you go!” Renfield yelled as lightning struck the bridge once again. He struggled to pull her up, but her hand was wet and slippery and he had little leverage. The best he could do was hold on, hoping that one of the officers at the barricade would hurry to their aid.

He held on to her with one hand and on to the bridge with the other, knowing he couldn’t hold on for much longer. With the wind blowing her body around like a rag doll and her hand wet and slippery he could feel her slipping.

Dangling high above the river, Kerri looked up into his eyes just as lightning flashed again. In that instant it stopped raining, the wind stopped howling and she smiled. The serene smile of someone who knew she was about to do the right thing and was at peace with the decision.

She mouthed ‘I’m sorry’, and simply twisted free of his hand.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

“NO! NO!” Renfield screamed as he watched her disappear into the darkness. 

His screams turned to whispers as he spun around, clamping his hands over his face, and slumped to the ground. “No, no, no…”

It took Ray and Fraser a few seconds to understand what had happened. Once they did Ray yelled at Fraser, “stay with him,” as he ran to dispatch several officers to the river bank. He then ran on to a patrol car to grab the radio. Once he had verified that the Marine Unit had been notified and had boats in the area, he ran back to Fraser and Turnbull.

“There’s cops on the bank and on boats in the water,” he reported to Fraser. Looking at Turnbull, his blood ran cold. “Let’s get him into a car.”

Even though it had stopped raining at the exact same moment Kerri slipped away, the ground was still very slippery, so it took both of them to lift the big man to his feet. They supported and led him to a waiting patrol car then tucked him into the backseat. Both men then moved a few feet away from the car.

“Is there anything we can do?” Fraser asked.

Ray shook his head sadly. “Water’s really cold ‘n movin’ fast. There’s not much chance…” he said as he looked over at the man in the back of the car. “What’re we gonna do ‘bout him?”

“He seems to be quite undone,” Fraser mused.

“Ya think!” Ray snapped. “He just watched her fall to her-” he just couldn’t bring himself to say ‘death’. “A course he’s ‘undone’!” It is hard to watch anyone die, but this time it was someone they knew, someone who had become important to them, important to him. Ray knew he was going to have trouble coming to terms with this – as soon as he allowed himself the time to think about it.

“That’s not what I meant, Ray!” And you know it, Fraser thought. “What I meant was,” he explained, a little too sharply, “that maybe one of us should stay with him for the rest of the night.”

Ray realized immediately that he had jumped on Fraser for no good reason. “Sorry, Frase,” he said. “This whole thing’s just like a bad dream,” he said, trying to justify his outburst. But then he just had to say, “she wasn’t…uh…was…”

“You’ll miss her?” Fraser shuffled his feet momentarily.

“Yeah,” he sighed. Then, quickly searching for another topic, he said, “I’ll take him ta my place for the night.”

“And I’ll inform the Inspector that Turnbull will be taking a sick day tomorrow.”

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Ray unlocked his door and Turnbull walked slowly in. “Sorry it’s pretty much of a mess,” Ray apologized. “I wasn’t plannin’ on company.”

Since he was dragged away from the bridge Turnbull had not spoken. He seemed to be lost in his own little world and that really worried Ray. But he much preferred worrying about Turnbull to actually having time to think about all that had happened.

He cleared the sofa and directed Turnbull to sit. He then went to a cupboard in the kitchen and withdrew a bottle of bourbon. Pouring a stiff shot into a coffee cup, he took it to his visitor.

Turnbull took the cup and looked at Ray. “Bourbon,” Ray explained. “Drink it, it’ll do ya good.” To his surprise Turnbull downed the entire thing in only a couple of swallows.

Ray took the cup back to the kitchen and jumped in surprise when he turned and realized he’d been followed.

“Is she gone?” Turnbull asked softly.

Ray sighed. He was hoping to avoid this conversation until they’d both gotten some sleep. “They’re lookin’ Buddy,” he said. “There’ll be more answers after daylight.” He hesitated. “They know where to find us if they…”

“Find her body.”

“Or find her alive!”

“It’s doubtful they will find her at all,” Turnbull stated without emotion.

Ray knew that to be true. More often than not, when a jumper or some poor unsuspecting person was lost in the river their bodies were never found. But he wasn’t about to admit that, not yet. And certainly not to Turnbull. “Why don’t we just get some sleep ‘n see how things look in the mornin’?”

Ray was relieved that Turnbull didn’t press the issue. “You gonna be okay on the couch? It’s kinda short for you.”

“I’ll be fine on the floor, thank you.”

Ray brought out a couple of blankets and a pillow, the one that Kerri had used only a couple of nights before. Ray chose not to think about that, however. “This gonna be okay?”

“Yes.”

“Okay then.” Ray could not understand why he was nervous. “Good night.”

Ray awoke before dawn. It took him just a little while to realize why he was so uneasy, but once he did he wished he was still sleeping. Monday had started out bad enough, but this had turned out to be the week from hell. No one had called during the night, so he had to assume there was no news, and in this case no news was bad, very bad news.

He shuffled into the living room, barefoot and scratching himself, to check on Turnbull. He came to an abrupt halt just a few steps beyond the doorway. Turnbull was gone.

Now why didn’t that surprise him?

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

He was back at the bridge by first light. Since Turnbull wasn’t at the apartment, this was the logical place to find him. There were only a handful of officers left on the scene, plus the crime scene guys who had apparently just arrived. There wasn’t much they could have accomplished in the dark, so that wasn’t much of a surprise.

It didn’t look to him like there were any boats in the water, which also wasn’t much of a surprise. If they were going to find…anything…it wasn’t going to be anywhere near the bridge, not with that current. Ray scanned the riverbank and caught a glimpse of red.

Ordinarily he would have made one of the uniforms slip and slide down the icy embankment to bring someone back. But this time was different. This was Turnbull down there and Ray had to find out if he was okay. The thought that Turnbull might throw himself into the river after her was only the briefest of thoughts.

Ray tried his best not to slide down the steep slope on his butt. He was a detective after all and had to maintain at least a little decorum. Although it was debatable as to whether or not he knew what decorum actually meant. He did indeed obtain his objective, decorum intact.

He stood and watched Turnbull for several moments before approaching him. Sometime during the night it had started to snow and it was mounding on Turnbull’s Stetson and shoulders. It looked like he had been standing, stock still and staring at the water for quite some time and probably freezing since his uniform was undoubtedly still wet from yesterday’s rain.

Finally, Ray knew he needed to intrude on Turnbull’s solitude. He walked up quietly and simply stood next to the much taller man. They stood that way, staring at the water for several minutes.

Finally, Ray sighed. He knew he had to break the silence. “They’re gonna be calling off the search pretty soon,” he stated quietly.

“I assumed as much,” Turnbull whispered.

“They wouldn’t find her…her,” he still couldn’t bring himself to say the word, “around here anyways, the current’s too fast,” Ray said, trying his best to put a positive spin on it.

“They’re not going to find her anywhere,” Turnbull replied, without emotion.

“She coulda got out a the water somewhere down river…”

“She never went into the water, Ray.”

Ray couldn’t believe his ears. “I sorry Buddy, but you saw her go in,” he whispered.

“No, Ray. I saw her fall. I did NOT see her go into the water.”

Ray thought about what the other man had said for a very long time. “But…” Finally he understood. “So you think she actually fell into…made it back to that other place? That alternate universe?” Ray was having a really hard time wrapping his brain around the possibility.

“I’m sure of it.” Turnbull said.

Again, Ray took his own sweet time processing. “She convinced me that she was from that place, so I guess it’s possible,” and that possibility made him feel amazingly better. “At least I hope you’re right. I hope she found her way home.” He heard Turnbull sigh. “She kinda got under yer skin, didn’t she?”

“Very much so,” Turnbull admitted.

“Me too,” Ray agreed. Then he remembered something Turnbull had said, screamed actually, on the bridge. Something about wanting her to stay with him. Maybe she had done more than just get under his skin. He put his hand on the taller man’s shoulder and squeezed gently. “You gonna be okay with…with all this?” he asked, gesturing toward the water.

“Yes,” he whispered. “As long as I know that she’s happy with him – her Renfield, then yes, I will be fine.”

“I’ll miss her,” Ray admitted.

“As will I.”

They stood there awhile longer, lost in their own thoughts. Eventually Ray looked at Turnbull. “We need ta get you outta the snow before you turn into a Mountie snow cone.” Renfield chuckled and Ray was genuinely pleased. Again he thought of Fraser, who would have never caught his meaning. Fraser denser than Turnbull? Now there was something to think about!

He patted the other man on the shoulder, sending a small snow drift to the ground as he did. Then he turned to go. With Turnbull following him, he said, “ya know, Kerri said you ‘n me were friends – in her world.”

“Best friends, yes.”

“Maybe we could work on that-huh? Bein’ friends, I mean.” Ray asked.

“I’d like that, Ray,” Turnbull replied as they started to trudge up the embankment.

“So – can I call you Renny?” Ray teased, slipping in the snow as they climbed.

“No,” Turnbull said as he grabbed Ray’s arm to keep him from falling. “You do like curling, right, Ray?”

“How about bowling? That’s kinda like curling, but without the ice, not ta mention the housework!”

They both chuckled as they reached the top of the hill, secure in the knowledge that Kerri had found her way home. They would probably never get anyone else to believe them, but somehow that didn’t matter, they both knew the truth. And that knowledge gave them a truly special bond. The bond of a new found friendship.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

She was alive! Why the hell was she alive? Kerri had no idea how she got there, but one minute she was hanging over the edge of a bridge and now she was sitting, in the rain, on that damnable bench across from the trashy vacant lot.

It hadn’t worked! She’d killed herself, or at least she’d tried to. What else could she possibly do? How was she ever going to get back to the Author so that she could be deleted! Put out of her misery. Committed to oblivion. Ceased to exist. Ended this nonexistence. She knew that she didn’t belong in this universe and every bone in her body ached from trying to leave. But if she didn’t belong here, and she couldn’t get back, what on earth was she supposed to do?

She hung her head and buried her face in her hands. “God, what am I supposed to do? All I want is to be DELETED!” she sobbed.

“Now why would you possibly want that?”

Her head snapped up in surprise to see the Author sitting next to her. “You’re here! Thank God! I’ve been trying to get back forever!”

“I know,” the Author said.

“You know?!” 

“Who do you think has been writing all of this stuff down? I’ve been watching all along,” she grinned.

“Good god, woman, why didn’t you just let me die!!? It’s the same thing as being deleted, I don’t care what you say! Why the heck did you let me suffer? Are you some sort of sadist? Did you just want to say, ‘I told you so’?” Kerri wailed. And then added as an afterthought, “and why in the hell is it raining on me and not you?”

The Author held up her hands to stem the flow of Kerri’s angry words. “Dying is a whole lot different than being deleted, I tried to explain that to you before you ran off!” She sighed, “and no, I didn’t want to say I told you so. I wanted you to know that I was wrong too,” she admitted. 

“Yeah, right! Wrong to let me run off, wrong to not delete me when you had the chance, wrong to let me think I knew more about the others than you did, wrong to think-”

Once again the Author held up her hand. “I think that’s enough wrongs for today.”

“Can you just delete me and put me out of my misery? Please?” Kerri pleaded.

“And I repeat, why would you want me to do that?”

“WHY? You just said you’d been WATCHING! How can you possibly ask-”

“Apparently you HAVEN’T been watching,” the Author said and inclined her head toward the other side of the street.

Kerri looked in the direction the Author was indicating and screamed. She then threw her hands up over her mouth. 

There, in the blazing sunlight, right where it belonged, stood Great Expectations. The Author had taken the time to see that the all the window trim had received a fresh coat of paint. The creaky old front door had new glass and the old, rough wood had been sanded and re-stained. The awnings had been redone and the windows cleaned to a sparkle. Even the bright brass lettering over the first floor windows had been shined so that it gleamed in the sunlight.

On the sidewalk in front of the beautifully refurbished building stood Renny holding Beth, with Ray, Benton and Meg hovering close by. They were all smiling and waving, except for Renfield, who looked as if he were about to jump out of his skin with excitement. Even Bethy waved and giggled at her mommy.

Kerri screamed a second time and hit the ground running. She screeched to a halt in the middle of the street where she spun around to the Author. “What’s going to happen to the Renfield in the other place, the place where I was?” But the Author and the bench were gone. Kerri looked toward the sky. “Take care of him. Please?” Without another thought she continued her sprint across the street and launched herself into Renny’s arms - only a split second after Ray had grabbed Lizard Breath from her father to keep the baby from getting squished between her parents.

Renny gathered Kerri up and spun her around in the sunlight, laughing all the while. A moment later the entire group headed into the bookshop, the events of the last few days completely forgotten. The bell over the shiny wooden door jingled softly as it closed soundly behind them.

The Author smiled wistfully and was about to power down her trusty laptop when the bell over the bookshop door jingled again. Benton Fraser appeared and strode to the curb. Even though she’d written that she would be invisible to all of them, Fraser looked directly at her. He smiled briefly, and then tipped his hat. 

“Thank you kindly,” he said, and then turned and reentered the shop.

The Author was smiling deeply as she typed the last line of her fable:

And so the Kingdom of Layers was restored and Castle Great Expectations rebuilt with Sir Renfield and Lady Kerri safely ensconced inside - and they all lived happily ever after.

And the Kingdom of the Other Place? That is a tale to be told another time.

The true end of Layers


End file.
